Marginal Notes

A ceaseless flow of commentary in an attempt to become thoughtful or empty

March 30, 2004

My mood has taken an inexplicable, and drastic turn towards… bad. Maybe it’s the weather that’s been awfully shitty these past few days. Maybe it’s my mountain of work casting its long shadow upon me. It could be the intelligence drought that has parched this city leaving a limited number of conversationalists. Or perhaps it’s my inability to drink every night inducing the coma like stupor that so many VCU students seem to enjoy. VCU…what a waste of tuition this place is. I thought stupidity ran rampant at Cave Spring but VCU…VCU is a joke.

Maybe it’s this retarded diet. I’m losing weight but food is definitely no longer a joy. I need to start exercising more regularly instead of these sporadic visits to Cary Street. It’s been in the news lately that walking helps women recovering from breast cancer. Walking, however, is not something that I want to do. I hate to walk to class. Intersections make me want to retch. Whenever I cross now, I wait until someone is next to me so if a truck decides to fuck up again at least I know the person beside me will weather most of the blow. And that, folks, is why I’m going to hell.

I don’t know. I think most shrinks would say it’s a combination of factors causing my irritability and melancholy.

Personally, I think I just need to be fucked.

March 11, 2004

Subject: Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky
Quote: “If the First Lady can’t satisfy her man someone should. He’s the president. He should have a designated member of his cabinet to ‘service’ him”

This was the discussion in my Mass Com Breakout class. The quote is from a size 0 blonde with mammoth breasts and a heart tattoo on her neck. People like this are setting the women’s movement back decades. What really blew my mind were the four other girls that agreed with her.

Maybe she said it for shock value. Maybe she wanted to impress the male population sitting in awe of the words coming out of her mouth. Amazed that a blonde could be so coherent. Maybe it was both. Either way, it was a sad, sad day for cultured women everywhere.

It’s not just the outrageous statements they regurgitate between their arduous binge and purge sessions; it’s their aspirations that disturb me. “I want to be in Playboy”, said the petit 2.0 GPA in hot pants and a tank top. At this point I think “God, was Barbie really this powerful?” What happened to wanting to be a doctor or a lawyer? Fuck…even a housewife.

But I’m not worried. When I’m winning the Pulitzer or the Booker, they’ll be working at Dunkin’ Donuts supporting their illegitimate children.

So to all of those woman who say, “Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful”
I say, "Don’t worry. I hate you because your stupid"